Song of the moment:"Dooms Day" by Gackt
I feel: Like ranting


You know what? I thought I was getting better. Especially after Miyu called me. He's hella cool, and I can't believe he's a guy! :x

But yeah. After I got off the phone, I go online and checked my email. I get this stupid, tacktless email from ____ [I'll keep his privacy, due to my stupid integrity]. Yeah, I'll just post the whole series of back and forth email here.

Email 1 - ____
"If you translate this, I'll die laughing...

³»°¡, Çб³¿¡ÀÖ´Â ³²ÀÚ »ç¶ûÇØ. ³²ÀÚ À̸§Àº µô·Ð À̾ß... ³×°¡ °³À̾ÈÀ̾ß... ÇÏÇÏÇÏ.....

Nega Gaggyo e Itnun Namja Saranghe. Namja Iirum un, Dirron Iiya... Nega Gei Ahniiya... HaHaHa...

Ask me about it when you're done...

(it's not true though... just wanted to play with your head)"

Reply 1 - Me
*holding back the urge to say, "How the hell should I know? I'm not fucking Korean. And why would I care?"* [I hold things back A LOT, usually to people that I care about as friends and that I think are 'cool' most of the time.]

"o_O;;;

Uhh.... if you haven't noticed, I'm not Korean. XD"

Reply 2 - ____
"No, you smartass... there are other wayz of figuring it out...

durrr... tard



*the "re" chuckles*"

Reply 3 - Me
[Okay. I hold back the urge to make him look utterly stupid, and he returns the favor by calling me a smartass. WHO'S the smartass? Heh. With the shit that happened today, this little comment totally triggered me. You don't know ____, he's already got into a back-and-forth argument with Lorraine, over something stupid. He always does stupid things, and says unnecessary comments--especially about Filipinos. Like, for example, how Filipinos are stupid and that Korea has so much more accomplishments than the Philippines. He was comparing facts about OTHER people and the accomplishments of OTHERS, instead of giving out facts about himself, and the idiocy of the person he's having the argument with. But when he does, he obsesses about his "high IQ", and how he's the smartest kid in Junior High. He even says how he's smarter than SOME high schoolers. Sure, that may be true, but SO? Not everyone is based in one single scale of smartness and lack of ability to learn.]

"Heh. Who's PMSing now? *rolls eyes* And don't give me some shit and reply with "duuurr... i wasn't PMSing. Unlike you, 979347593475435% of the time. I was being sarcastic" because that's usually the reason why Lorraine and I act the same way with you, at least... at the beginning of each fight. Although, your hypocritical replies and vice nonsense eventually DOES start to piss us off.

And I'M the smart ass? I completely held out the urge to be a bitch in my last reply, because I didn't want to get into another USELESS fight with you like Lorraine. There are other, more important things I have to worry about like my stepdad moving out because of ME, old rival 'friend' issues with George, and other shit that I am not obliged to tell you.

I'll stop there with my shit from you. If you want war, I'll give you war... if you really really, need war, just announce it. I am fucking there. Just be ready to read an eternity worth's of ranting, bitching and reasons why Lorraine and I feel the way we feel about you, most of the time. You know what? I hold a lot of things back because I have enough conflict and fights in my insignificant life than to have one that can be delt with "I'm sorries" and forgetting.

But if you really want it, need it, crave for it, then I'll fucking give it to you. Don't mess with a GIRL that has had so much shit in her life, that holds EVERYTHING inside, until times like this... times of idiocy and worthless imbecility. Do you know what I had to go through when I was only 7 with my FIRST stepdad? He was handicapped. My mom was never home, so I had to take care of him. Do you know what I had to do? Do you? I had to clean his diapers, clean out his urinal, and fucking walk him to the bathroom... at the times that he knows he actually knows that he has to go. Although, he usually just shits in his fucking wheelchair, leaving me to clean after it. Heh.

My mom? Yeah, she still hits me. Always has, still does and always will. She hit me right across the head in front of my friends, in my own birthday party while bitching how I wasn't being a good hostess to my friends. Do you know what my real dad used to do to my brother back in the Philippines for punishment? He would whip my brother across his bony, meatless back and hang him from his feet to the ceiling. Do you know what illness my brother had back then? He had an internal organ deficiency, which can be fatal, if certain situations were harsh. He threw up blood and he was so skinny, he always had to go to the hospital to get injected so that he wouldn't die from the shortage of blood. And me? What did my dad do to me in the Philippines? He gave me bruises that lasted for weeks, several black eyes and bloody noses. I was only 3--turning 4.

I'm sad to say it, but I'm glad that he's passed away.

Do you want me to go on? Do you?

From now on, for every stupid shit you give me that consists of idiot replies and useless nonsense that hold hypocritical value, I will give you a page of bitching. Go ahead, say that I'm on PMS. Say that I'm a bitch. My own mother calls me a bitch, and I don't care. Do you think that I would care if you called me a bitch? Are you really THAT important in my life, that your every single diss, opinion and critiscizm to me, at me or about me really makes that much of an impact on me? Are you?

So go on, start a war. I don't care either way.. again, either pretending that nothing happened and be buddy-buddy again; or having a vice argument about all the shit that I said to you, you said to me, and we said to each other like what you did with Lorraine. Just remember--I can be a really good friend, but if you seriously crave to be my enemy, then I can be the worst enemy in the entire history and future history of your life."

--------

I can hold things in for a long time, but if a bunch of shit piles up higher and higher in my "jar of taciturnity" in one single day, and then someone goes of saying something stupid after a history of saying stupid things, then I go all out. At least I'm giving him and option of backing out. That's all I need, but if he really wants war, then he is definitely setting himself up to failure. Afterall, my teachers and friends always said that I would make a good lawyer, because I never lose an argument I was ment to win.